Coffee or Tea?

Since I first came to Spain, in 1999, I have loved coffee, particularly espresso or a good cappichino. In fact I make myself a soy cappichino most mornings in Spain.

Well... from time to time, knowing that caffeine really isn't that great for your body, (specifically it drains your adrenal glands and makes you more tired overall and actually decreases you alertness and ability to concentrate (and obviously you become a bit addicted and dependent on it)) I take a break from caffeine all together. And somehow it is much easier to do so in Missouri suburbia than it is in Madrid, Spain, where life revolves around food and coffee. It's true.

So upon arriving home, I pulled out the Spanish cafetera, spanish coffee pot my dad bought when he was in Spain (but by the way has never actually used himself ;-)) and began making coffee & cappichinos. Well, after about a day or two, I just got tired of the hastle of making it and thought, "Now would be good time to detox my body from coffee and caffeine, at least now when things are a bit more tranquilo (calm)."

It didn't hurt that I found some Key Lime Rooibos Teavana tea (no caffeine or teina) in the kitchen, which by the way looks really pretty (with flowers and such) and tastes good and refreshing. So at least for a little while I will be decaffeinated and more of an Herbal Tea girl.

Prince Caspian

A few days ago my parents and I went to see the new Narnia movie, "Prince Caspian," based on the book by C.S. Lewis. It was great! I am a bit biased as I listened to my dad read these books growing up and I just think they are great stories. It takes you to this magical land and I always love how Aslan is portrayed. Anyway, it's definitely a movie to see, although it's a little violent for little kids (in my opinion).

Road Trip

So... I am headed off on a little road trip. The truth is that it really is more about getting from Missouri to Florida, but I figured that I might as well add in some fun stops that include places I've never been to, specifically New Orleans. It helps also that I have friends and family along the way.

So, here is the plan thus far.

I'll take off from St.Peters, MO, early Tuesday morning (june 3) and head south to Louisiana. I'll hang out there and hopefully get to see my friend Danielle and crash on her couch. Then I'll take off the next morning to go along the southern coast and stop in Tallahassee to see my friend Angelica (who is actually Spanish and from Madrid, I met her here, but now she her husband and little boy reside in Florida) and her family and spend the night there. Then I'll take off leisurely the next morning to finish the trip to Orlando.

I'll be in Orlando for about a month as one of the coach for CCC's cross-cultural training for staff heading overseas long-term.

Then early on July 11 I'll get back in the car, head up to Atlanta, to maybe grab a meal with Macy and her husband. I'll head over to Huntsville, Alabama, to see some cousins on my mom's side and possibly spend the night there. I'll, either that night or the next morning, head up to Louisville, KY, to hang out with my good friend Kristie who recently came to visit me in Madrid (and do tons of research for her PhD). I'll get to see her baby and family and then make the trek back to St.Louis.

I'm excited... particularly about the New Orleans part and seeing some friends I haven't seen in quite awhile. :-)

Can you believe this is real? It's in the Black Rock Desert in Nevada. Amazing!

Relativity

AHHH!!! So, I just overheard someone say, "What's the difference between someone saying that a 10 year old can marry a 50 year old, or saying that Jesus is Lord? If someone's religion believes that than they should be free to practice whatever they believe. And who is the government to define or pass laws that tell them they can't do what the believe. Everyone should be free to practice what they believe to be true."

What a load of poop! I mean really! No standards what-so-ever? I mean, I agree that we should have freedom of religion. But, at some point, we also need to define what moral issues we are going to take a stand on. It can't just be total anarchy or total "do whatever you want, whatever feels good to you." As I said before, what a bunch of poop!

There are things that are not just about preference. I mean, for instance incest and rape and murder and theft. Someone could just as quickly say, "I think it's okay to take from people who have enough." That's not just okay. And particularly when it hurts someone else or violates someone else's rights or puts one's own life in jeopardy. It's not just okay. And I think it's perfectly fine for us to dictate that a girl is not old enough to marry at the age of 10, particularly if it's to a man four times her age.

Note: They were talking about some show on TV about polygamy, cults, Mormons,... and this was right after the same person went on and on about how horrible Bush is and how anyone who agrees with him should be locked up... So, what gives someone the right to say that Bush is wrong, but that everyone else can do whatever they want. I'm not saying that I'm all in favor of Bush, but I am saying that if everything is relative than it's a complete contradiction to than say that someone is wrong, no?

My first week back in the US

This picture in some ways describes my first week back. Rain, rain, and more rain...

The weather has definitely been primarily that. Rain and cool.

In terms of happenings, of what I've done... I have observed the US culture a bit from afar, almost as if I were coming here for the first or second time... somewhat from a distance (which i guess makes sense, since it's been two years).


... I've renewed my driver's license, changed my voter's registration to Missouri from Kansas (where I lived before moving to Spain), got a new library card and residence card in St.Peters, MO (where I grew up and where my parents live), got an international driver's license (super easy, just pay $15 and show them your US license), sent off to renew my passport,...

... was shocked by the huge rise in gas prices and prices in general... I think it's all about doubled... to the point that it's about the same as europe prices (even with the dollar-euro exchange rate).

... bought a ton of fabric to make a couple things (thanks to a great Memorial Day sale)

... eaten some INCREDIBLE sushi at the restaurant my family always goes to in St.Louis - Tachibana, off of Olive Blvd., ate some great Afghani food with my parents & aunt and uncle, while they asked me all about Spain, my life in Spain, and Spanish culture,...

... had lunch with several people

... saw one of my best friends and her new adorable baby (who I forgot to take pictures of) -- Sydney Jane is her name -- and we went to the Missouri Botanical Gardens, one of my favorite places in St.Louis

... talked to some fun friends on the phone

... take a few walks and have a million memories come to mind

... saw the new Narnia movie "Prince Caspian" with my parents, which by the way was GREAT!

... checked out a few books from the library

... got a new battery for my Mac & started to brush up on my french a bit

... went to the health food store I used to work at and where I came to really know Jesus, place my faith in him, and begin to see him work in my life

... and have had a horrible stomach ache now for about three days... i'm sure something i ate had milk in it, but it's not going away... but i did go to the health food store i used to work at and got some stuff that should help

... i'm sure there is more, but that's the jist of it

coming home...

So... Sunday i went to church at my home church, Old Orchard PCA in Webster Groves, MO. It's not actually the church i grew up in, but it is the church that has been a family and a home church to me since i first went there, back in 1999 when I was living in the city in St.Louis. They very quickly treated me as their own and were really that, a family to me even though they didn't know me from Adam. Since then they have been my "home church."

As I walked in the doors and was greeted by countless people who know me, I felt at home. I actually felt more at home there than I have felt since I got back. It was the same. The people were the same, even though a couple years had passed and physically some of them had changed a bit. The preaching was amazing, poignant and relevant as always and firmly grounded in who God is. And it was great that all I had to do was sit and listen and take it all in.

Afterward I had people invite me to lunch and several people insist that I have lunch with them sometime this week. It was nice to have people initiate with me and to be taken care of, without doing anything. I am so grateful for these people both in the past and in the present, but also for what may come in the future. I so appreciate the realness of them, their genuine love and acceptance, and their fear and love of God as God. It so ministers to my heart.

And they are definitely AMAZING! And definitely a gift, a very good gift from God.

Leaving Spain (temporarily) & Arriving to the US - Part 1

My amazing friend Dave said that I should entitle this "I am foolish, God is Good." That is probably a pretty befitting title.

So... it all begins the night before I returned to the US. Some amazing friends asked if I needed help getting to the airport with my luggage, or if I just wanted some help. I said, "Sure... it definitely would be nice to have company," and Dave planned to stop by my apartment the next morning at 9:30am, so we'd have plenty of time to make the trek to the airport.

We took off and I was amazing how much easier it was having a tall, strong friend to carry my heavy luggage and to lift it up and down all the stairs. Dave asked me how I ever managed to do this alone and I said, "Well, I just do. I just get going and then at some point when I finally am exhausted say to myself, 'Well, you've made it this far.' And somehow once I'm on the way it's hard to justify getting a taxi instead of just pushing the rest of the way." It was amazing how easy it was and Dave wasn't even really tired. I am usually exhausted by the time I get to the airport.

This may sound strange, but the easiest route to the airport (without a taxi or car) is walking to the metro (just a block), carrying the suitcases up and down 3 flights of stairs to the actual train, taking it one stop, transferring to another line (the orange or 7 line) via an escalator, taking it three stops, going up 5 escalators (thank God for escalators), walking a little ways, getting on the bus to the airport, getting off, and walking into the airport. The other route involves only walking and the metro, but involves two transfers one of which adds at least two flights of stairs and once you get to the airport you have about a mile (literally) to walk to the actual international terminal to check your luggage. And taxis are an option, but for at least 35 Euros from my house (now over $50).

So, anyway,... Dave and I arrive, get in line with US Airways. I get to the person who asks the bizillion security questions. He looks at my passport and asks, "Do you have a renewal paper?" Confused I showed him my Spanish ID card and he said, "No, I mean a renewal for your passport." I say, "What do you mean?" and look extremely confused and he says, "Your passport is expired."

My stomach drops. No way! How in the world!?!?!?

So he goes and talks to a very kind woman who asked if I wanted to wait a half an hour for someone from the US Embassy to come. (As if I had any other option.) I said, "Yes" of course and we went to talk with the US Airways people about the possibility of changing my flight (for free - crazy?) if I didn't get on this one. They said there would be no problem and I went to wait.

Dave by this time had called his wife and their whole team (he works with MTW) to pray for me. Amazing! And he ran downstairs to get us both some coffee and breakfast. As we were waiting he offered to go with me to the US Embassy if necessary. Again, I have some amazingly awesome friends.

The embassy woman arrived sooner than expected, scolded me for having let it expire, got on her Blackbury for what seemed like an eternity, came back and told me to not ever let this happen again (as if she needed to tell me). She said, "It's on record that this has happened, so don't ever let it happen again." I then asked, "So, I can get on my plane?" She said yes and I was on my way.

The kind lady from before got me an escort to the gate, since I'd have to got through several more security checkpoints all of whom would say, "Did you know your passport is expired?" and then my escort would explain and they would call someone and let me pass.

Amazing! Amazingly smooth, amazingly gracious of them,... just amazing. The Lord was really kind to me.

So I got on my flight. And ten or so hours later we landed in Philadelphia, where we went through Customs. The guy there asked me about the passport situation and after asking me five times what I did and who I worked for and after telling me a few times that they really shouldn't have let me get on the plane, let me go with no trouble. He didn't even make me go through the crazy intense search someone he consulted said that I should go through. He just let me pass on through and said, "I guess I know you'll get this taken care of because you obviously want to be on the flight back."

I then rechecked my luggage and got on my next flight (to Chicago). I put away my passport and got out my driver's license so I could stop answering the "Did you know your passport was expired?" questions and went on my way.

I'll have to blog later about my first impressions of the US after 2 years of being gone.

We landed in Chicago (which is actually one of my favorite airports to have a layover in, unlike many people; i just love all the places to walk around and explore and the places to sit for several hours). And a few hours later I was landing in St. Louis at 11pm and was met by my parents.

So that is the story...

And the WHY... I don't really know what happened. I thought about it last year and made a mental note. Then I thought about it in January and though, "No, it's too early, but I won't forget since I'm going home sometime this summer." Then I was messing with getting a new residence visa in Spain and finally got it, so completely forgot that I needed to take care of my US passport. (And that was also about the time my life got pretty busy.) It expired April 30, less than a month before. And I just sent off for a renewal passport today, which should be here in four weeks or less.

All this to say I am soooo grateful for great friends and for a mighty and gracious God who helped me out in countless ways that day.

FYI

So, two pieces of FYI... One, I'm going to be keeping friends in Spain up on my life while I'm back in the US temporarily via my blog, so... if you find a post in Spanish and get scared, no worries. you are at the right place and it was intended for them. (Actually, change in plans... I'm going to put my spanish blog at http://www.cafeconsoja.blogspot.com (which is actually how you spell it instead of with a "y"). So you can check it out there if you so desire.

I'll try to include more or less the same in Spanish and in English, but that's the way it will be at least during my jaunt in the US (now through mid-July). And it's a great opportunity to practice some Español :-)

P.S. ALSO... I'd love to see as many of you as I can, so give me a call or drop me an e-mail if want to get together sometime. I'll be in Missouri, Kansas, Florida (and driving from Missouri to Florida - likely through SE Missouri, Tennessee, Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, Florida (on the way) and then Florida, Georgia, Alabama, Kentucky, Illinois, and Missouri), and briefly in North Carolina (for my cousin's wedding).

Sex

So... after having written the last post I still have a bit to say. This is no new newsflash by any means, but I haven't actually written it on this blog and I am in the midst of processing a bit, so here goes...

I am SOOO sick of seeing the idea of casual sex glorified and the idea that it is natural and normal for men and women to jump from person to person with no real consequences nor repercussions.

There is nothing WRONG with a woman or man wanting to be with one man or woman for their whole life, for having a fully monogamous relationship, and for not having tried things out sexually before this person nor before they commit themselves to one another for life. There is nothing wrong with it and in fact it is the way we were MEANT to live.

Marriage is NOT a thing of the past. Marriage is NOT just about tradition nor is it rigid in a bad way. Marriage is a very GOOD thing. It is a very SACRED thing. As is sex and love.

Sex is not bad nor is it something dirty. It is something very good and very beautiful. It is something wonderful. And it is something holy and divine. It is something originated by God. It is something meant to draw two people together - body, mind, and soul. It is something to knit two people together and make them one. It is something very good.

But it is something made to be between one man and one woman. Something between one man and one woman who have committed themselves to one another before God and before man. I still love the illustration given by Rob Bell in the Nooma videos. Here is a little summary of a friend's talk that gave a similar illustration.

"The subject, being Valentine's Day, or día de los enamorados / día de san valentín, was LOVE. Sofía, one of the staff at En Vivo, gave the talk. She talked about her and Jesse (her husband)'s first date and how their relationship unfolded with a lot of witty comments along the way. Then she talked about the book Song of Songs from the Bible. She read Song of Songs 2:7, "Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires."

She then talked about the three types of love found in Hebrew. Both Rob Bell (with Nooma - www.nooma.com) and Sofia both described these loves with three flames, which can burn individually, but burn much brighter and more fully together.

First is "raya," which is the type of love you have between friends. It is found in Song of Songs 4:7 (amongst others), "You're beautiful from head to toe, my dear love, beautiful beyond compare, absolutely flawless."

Second is the word "ahava." As Rob Bell explains it, "Ahava is the love of the will... This is way more profound than fleeting romantic feelings. This is much more than temporary urges. Ahava is making a decision to join your life to the life of another. This is an emotion that leads to commitment. Ahava is found in Song of Songs 8:7, "Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away. If one were to give all the wealth of his house for love, it would be utterly scorned."

The third Hebrew word for love, which is also found in Song of Songs, is the word "dode." It is the one we are more accustom to being associated with "love" at least in many contexts. It is the sexual, physical element in a love relationship. Dode literally means "carouse," "rock," "caress." It's the love described in some of the more explicit passages in Song of Songs. "May he kiss me with the kisses of his mouth, for your love is better than wine." (Song of Songs 1:2)

As Sofia (and Rob Bell) said, these three types of love, these three flames are meant to burn as one, moving from a small little spark or flame on a candle to a much larger, more sustaining fire. In the Nooma film Rob Bell made, it goes from a small fire to a huge bonfire you can see from miles away.

Love is not just physical and sexual, but also friendship and commitment. The "ahava" (willful love) and "raya" (friendship) are what take more intentionality and time. "Dode" love is important too, but it generally is not the hardest of the three to create.

This is really the bare basics of the talk, but I thought it was a great way to introduce the idea of what God says about love and also a great reminder of the type of love God desires for us - one rich and full of life."

So... my point is that it infuriates me when love and sex are misportrayed... when they are portrayed as less than what they are. And when they are shown as selfish, instead of selfless.

Disgusting and Repulsive

Ok... so this probably will reveal more about me than I would like and more about my imperfect family (as I suppose all families are). My desire is not to be judgmental, but more to vent a bit and to make a commentary on some things that infuriate me and also have affected me much more than I wish were the case. As I even begin this post I am not quite sure how to navigate the lines amidst honoring my family, working through my issues, and honoring holiness and purity without becoming both judgmental and hypocritical. Even as I write this much I wonder if I will actually ever post this post.

So, I arrived home last Wednesday night late. I went to bed and got up the next morning and ventured downstairs to my dad's newly re-put together office (in my old bedroom). I looks nice and looks both like an office and very functional. Unfortunately what my eyes quickly went to was not what I hoped to see there. Two fourteen inch high replicas of Princess Leah from Star Wars, but she is half naked, very scantily clad with a chain around her neck from the scene where she is in Jabba the Hut's lair. Definitely a bit scandalous and risk-que. And something that brings up far many emotions than I wish. It brings up anger, feeling a bit violated and definitely offended, and disgusted.

Now I live in a country where it is not uncommon to walk into a café and see a pin-up calender or to see a number of pornographic magazines just out in the open or to see very scantily clad models on just normal advertisements. While I don't like it, I also am not generally surprised to see it. But somehow seeing it in my dad's office during this visit has continued to infuriate and disgust me since I first saw it. Somehow I just didn't expect it there... somehow I always hope that he's changed... and somehow it always makes me remember that I have forgiven him and that I need to let that be independent of his behavior...

I know it goes back a long way and it is why I have issues at times thinking about guys (both in having to be careful to guard my mind but also to also realize that men can find a woman beautiful without lusting after her or thinking merely about sex).

There is something horrible and definitely hurtful and degrading about pornography, particularly to kids too young to process or filter what they shouldn't even be exposed to... and particularly when it as acted as if it is "just art" something for the whole family. yuck! definitely NOT normal nor by any means good.

So, yes, I need to go back to working through my anger and seeking to forgive, but realizing that it still affects me (both in seeing it and in having seen it). And that I am very much still in process here. And it is more than a bit both sobering and angering!!! I guess the positive in all of this is that I actually am angry instead of just hearing in my head that "it's my issues" and that "I just need to get over it" or that "it's just art, what's your problem." Maddening... and in some ways rightly so. And definitely repulsed and disgusted.


Note: You may see the "You are beautiful" picture and be confused based on this post. The picture somehow takes me back to what is true, instead of what is corrupted. It reminds me that the Lord sees me and sees me as beautiful. It reminds me that beauty really does go much deeper than just skin deep. It reminds me that all this messed up-ness is a pale, distorted reflection of what it should be. It makes me think that all of this so much does point to our need and my need for Jesus. It points to the fact that we are messed up; this world is messed up. And we are desperately in need of a Saviour. We are desperately in need of one to take our messed up-ness and make a way for us to be restored and for us to really KNOW our Creator, for us to let Him be in control of our lives and for Him to love us and make us complete. Somehow it always goes back to this. And thank God there is one who came to pay our debt, one who came to make us whole and make us like Him, one who came to restore our relationship with him. Praise the Lord! So, the picture, "you are beautiful" helps me to remember that even in the midst of both corruption and my messiness that God still looks at me and tells me that he DELIGHTS in me and that He thinks that I am beautiful in a very pure and real way.

Fun Friends

so this morning i said goodbye to katie, who's been here this past week in the midst of my crazy life. she has gone with me to campus, meetings, mini shopping trips, a spa, out dancing, around town, the grocery store, campus, threw a party with me,... fun times.

katie lived with me last year and was here in madrid the past 2 years. it was great to have her here in the midst of me freaking out a bit about going back to the US and scrambling to try to get things done in the midst of a way too busy week. she was a huge blessing.


as i said goodbye to katie, i went to the airport to pick up kristie, another friend who will be here the next two weeks. kristie and i lived together in lawrence, kansas, right after we both had returned from spain. we readjusted to life in the US together, ran a marathon, and had many fun times and adventures (my glowing pink-orange hair fiasco, tapas nights,...). and i was in her wedding before coming back to spain. that was three years ago. so, to say the least, it's great to see her again and to speak spanish again with her. so many good memories.

anyway, kristie is here writing her dissertation for her PhD in 18th and 19th century spanish literature. after she arrived we took a tour of the city while i showed her how to get to all the national libraries where she will spend the next weeks compiling her research. and we enjoyed some incredible tapas in plaza de santa ana. and i'm sure there are many more to come.

2 days in paris

a few days ago i found this amazingly cool video store with tons of foreign films and independent films and just a ton of movies to rent. katie and i picked 2 días en paris to watch, since we both like before sunset and before sunrise which feature julie delpy in paris. this one is actually a film by her.

i wouldn't say it was the best movie ever. and i'm not sure i would recommend the movie as a whole (it had a bit more discussion about sex than i would have wanted, offset only be the fact that it also made adam goldburg's character completely uncomforable), but there was an incredibly funny scene made even funnier by the fact that katie and i were exhausted and thus a bit slaphappy. it's almost at the end of the film (the second from the last chapter) and just in case you do desire to see it, i'll just include a couple quotes... hilarious.

"all we need is love, you and me... i'm a fairy... no, i mean a real fairy... you need to care for her, much care, give her lots of care..."

katie and i watched this scene three times and were crying we were laughing so hard.

a mix of emotions

so... i presently have a runny nose and a sore throat. i hate having a cold, feeling lethargic, but not so bad that i can't function, and having the horrible sensation of phlegm in all parts of my head. yuck.

somehow having a cold and a runny nose does always makes me think of the movie you've got mail (which by the way is one of my favorite movies) when meg ryan is sick and tom hanks brings her daisies. happy thoughts.

so, i am a little sick... and inevitably this is the worse time, in my mind, for me to be sick. a friend is visiting, i am trying to wrap up life in spain for the summer (at least the first half of the summer) and set up everything for my time in the US (which begins in about a week - crazy, ¿no?). definitely not the best time to have a runny nose, head congested, sore throat cold. the one good thing about it is that it has made me slow down a bit, actually try to take care of myself and sleep some, and say "no" to several things i would have just tried to cram in.

it has also helped me (along with my friend katie who is in town) to relax a bit. somehow the idea of returning to a country you supposedly know after two years of being away, with the intention of reconnecting with people on more than a superficial level in the course of just a couple of weeks, seems a bit daunting. and it doesn't help that the unknown effects of reverse culture shock loom overhead as well. i have no idea what to expect, good and bad. and on one hand that is actually exciting.

the things that excite me about going home are obviously seeing my family (and hopefully this will include some good time with my brother and sister), seeing some good friends (God-willing), a road trip to florida (likely passing through louisiana and mississippi, if it doesn't add too much time to the trip - i've never been to either state), seeing by brother on a long layover in philly (always fun), going to my cousin charlie's wedding in charlotte, nc, getting to share with people face-to-face what the Lord is doing here in Madrid (and in me) and whatever fun surprises may come.

things that are a bit overwhelming and pretty much out of my control at this point: really having quality time with the fam, my sister; actually getting more than a weekend with my sister and brother (in the midst of wedding stuff); actually seeing one of my best friends and some other good friends; really getting to connect with people; getting used to the pace of american life and american relationships (a half an hour or hour with someone versus two or three); and just the unknown. hmmm... it's good to write this all out, as it then doesn't quite seem as daunting. i mean, really, if the Lord has carried me this far and has provided for me the past almost thirty-two years, surely he will remain faithful in another country, which only came about because it seemed to be his will.

the other emotion has to do with my hanging out recently with a particular boy, who somehow inevitably makes me a bit uncontented with being single and who after spending time with him is on my mind entirely too much. the main problem with this is that we are at this point just friends and i so wish i knew what was going on, or what would go on.

so my mixed up emotions are presently, sick runny nose ness, anxious anticipation of going home mixed with way too many things on my mental to do list, and a bit of pining.

Being Known

There is something about being able to share with someone the good and the bad from your life. Feeling comfortable being fully open even with the stuff you are still wrestling with, still in the midst of.

So my friend, Katie, is here visiting. We lived together last year and it is nice to have somebody around to verbally process some of the stuff I've been thinking about recently. And it's great to have someone here who knows what my life looks like here, because she's lived here too. It's also nice as I wrap up things here before I head home to have her here, who just by her presence helps me to slow down a bit and put things back into perspective.

sensory overload

(note: preliminary thoughts about heading back to the states and "reverse culture shock" (going back to your mother country) which may seem strange, but is commonly understood to be much worse than that of going to a foreign country. this is the beginning, but i'll probably write more later...)

so, what for me is sensory overload is probably not the same as some. i live in a city of 5 million and am regularly jammed into a metro car where literally no one else can cram themselves in (because it's fully acceptable to physically cram yourself in - literally push your way in - to an already packed metro car, particularly during rush hour).

it's also not the quantity of people because there are a lot of places that i enjoy going that are cram packed with people. and i like to be there in part because of the shear quantity of people and the "life" there. now obviously i don't always enjoy that, but it is more the norm than the abnormal.

and, apparently, i read recently that the noise levels in madrid are not very healthy over the long-term. so, noise, which is nearly always present, isn't really what i'm talking about either.

what i am talking about is that sensory overload that i tend to experience when i return to the states. all the english just jumps out. i hear every conversation around me, word for work. i read every sign and every billboard without wanting to. i am amazed by all the english and read and hear everything. exhausting. and the reality is that there are advertisements absolutely everywhere.

the other thing that can overwhelm me a bit is the number of options. there are two sides to this, one, i enjoy the simplicity of having only a few options. usually for lunch, on campus or at a restaurant, you order the menu, which includes a first course plate, second course plate, a dessert, a drink and bread. you get one of each and there are at most 4 options for each. simple.

when you go to the grocery store, yes you have a whole aisle of olive oil to choose from and the same with types of jamon serrano, cheeses, olives and a few other things. and you have a fully stocked array of fresh fish to choose from. but the stores are much smaller to begin with. and there are only a few options for most things, not a bizillion. again... simplicity.

and i guess there is one more area of simplicity. it's just more normal to take time doing normal life things and to not use so many machines. for example, a 24-hour huge megagrocery store where everything exists is not that common, or at least not in walking distance from my house. also, i have a washer, but hang out my clothes to dry, as to most other people (probably 75-80%), no matter what social class you fall into. i don't have a dryer nor a dishwasher and food comes fresh (not prepackaged). while spaniards actually work an ungodly amount of hours (even by american standards), the pace of life is more relaxed.