lucas

so, words don't do it justice, but some dear friends of mine here in madrid just had a baby this morning, at 3am. and i just got to hold their less than a day old child, lucas david bryan. adorable and milagroso. absolutely amazing! somehow i managed to forget my camera. they have some great pictures, but i do not. so, happy birthday little lucas.

note: the picture isn't actually lucas, but i figured i needed a picture of a baby and could later put him there.

jet-lagged

so... i arrived at madrid at 7am this morning, after having left my parents' house at 6:30am the day before. i was doing well in terms of tired-ness and jetlaggedness until about now.

i am sitting in giangrossi, and ice cream place (with sorbet, of course), that has wifi and i'm sitting in one of the windows where i just happen to see a few dressed mannequins. i keep on glancing over at them, because i feel like they are looking at me. but of course when i glance over i think, dawn they are mannequins, not actual people. it became more apparent when a guy working at the store came to the window. crazy... and i think i may now go for a walk, as i try to stay awake for a few more hours.

:-)

latest movies

i'll write more later, but i watched a great movie today - Reign Over Me with Adam Sandler and the guy from Hotel Rwanda. it is definitely a sobering drama, but is amazing.

i recently watched bella and the ultimate gift, also good movie pics, particularly bella.

it's been a little while since i saw anything actually in the theater, but the new narnia movie, if it's still out, Prince Caspian, was great.

happy movie watching! i'm sure i'll have seen some more after my little hop across the ocean.

amazing shoes

okay... this needs to be my last post for tonight, so i finish packing and get some sleep... here are my fun new running shoes. i can't really believe i bought nikes and not new balance shoes, but the price and the fit were right. and i actually tried them both on to compare and nike won out, at least this time.

they do a great job of hugging my foot at the arch, so that my foot doesn't slide forward at all (and hopefully so i won't get the occasional blister on the ball of my foot). they are light, like the new balance (nb) and i hardly feel them running.

and, as i was unpacking them to put them in my carry-on, i found out that they have the secret compartment under your foot for the IPOD CHIP!!!! yippee!!! i had no idea. and now i don't have to carry it on the pouch on top of my laces. SOOO exciting!!! and obviously they were much cheaper here in the US than over where the euro currently reigns.

happy running!

traveling home (to madrid)

so... i am packing (and presently procrastinating packing). i have all except my carry-on packed (at least for now, until i realize i have too much for my carry-on).

today has been fairly uneventful although the last week has been jam-packed full of seeing fun people, traveling across several states (florida to georgia to tennessee to missouri to kansas and back to missouri). i've had sushi, ethiopian, pizza, lots of coffee, a good number of salads, and lots of blueberries (which i can't easily get in spain). also i bought another pair of running shoes today and was VERY happily surprised that my new shoes have a secret passageway for my ipod nike running chip (to measure how far and fast i go). definitely a pleasant surprise and a surprise.

hmmm... well i don't have much more to say other than i will miss the dear people i love who live in the US much!!! and particularly after having seen some of them briefly. i so wish all the people i loved lived closer, or that somehow i had a private jet and time traveling abilities.

but for now there is vonage and the blessings of living in the 21st century. i will be fairly out of touch for the next month, as most of that time will be spent in a fairly rural area. (i have 4 days in madrid and then head up to ligonde, in nw spain, where i will be for about 2 weeks, then back to madrid and then probably to morrocco with some students.) all that to say, i will blog and e-mail when i can, but if you don't hear from me, my life will return to semi-normal in september (the semester in spain starts october 1st).

thanks for all the memories!!!

oh, and by the way, i have a sweet 6-hour layover in philly to see my amazing brother who i love but don't get to see all that often.

a child?

so, yesterday amidst the many stops i hung out with one of my best friends, catha, and her little 5 mos old baby, sydney. sydney is adorable and has actually grown in her cuteness since i saw her last (when i first got home, end of may).

so as we were talking, catha mentioned that they are having a hard time choosing a guardian, or that person that would take care of their kid(s) should anything God forbid happen to her and john. and she said that of course it would be an easier decision if i lived in the US. i told her that of course if anything were ever to happen that i would be more than happy to take care of sydney and kin, although possibly in spain (or wherever i may be).

at the time it was an obvious reply, but as i went home and laid awake in bed, it occurred to me that it would be a HUGE life-changing decision, should, God-forbid, that ever happen. i began to think of all the decisions a parent moving kids overseas has to think about and all the decisions a parent in general would make. i mean, i'm sure i just touched the surface, but there is the issue of her grandparents all being in missouri-illinois, the wishes of her parents in terms of where she would grow up, where she would attend college (mainly if it would be in the us or abroad), her emotional trauma and all that she would go through if her parents died and then she moved overseas with her mom's best friend, but someone whom she only knew from occasional visits and cards. it made me then think briefly of if all this were to happen while i were single and how, if it happened tomorrow, how it would completely turn my world upside down too. how would i juggle it all? should i really be the one to raise their kid? so many questions. and the fact that this needs to be a real, prayerfully made decision, not just an "of course i'd take care of your kid because i'm your friend" answer. even though in a sense, i still think it is probably that easy. i mean i think it is that simple, even taking away the fact that my life would be turned upside down. sydney would be worth it. crazy... i mean really insane thinking that that could happen. but it could.

and now that i type all this out, i think it would actually be okay. very very complicated, but somehow the Lord would work it out. i mean my best friend in spain is a single mom and somehow she does it. definitely not ideal, nor what i'm hoping for, but just to say... and hopefully, sometime sooner than later i may actually find someone i'd want to spend the rest of my life with and get married and possibly have kids of my own. i know nothing is promised in that respect and i am fairly content with my life, but it is something i still desire (if, of course, i find someone i don't want to live without who, of course, feels the same way about me). it would be nice... and most likely will eventually happen.

worship

Worship, what it means and what it does to us in the process and what it does in the world are some things I have recently been contemplating. To add to these thoughts is a book I just began, "Manifest Presence," by Jack Hayford. I can't yet give you my opinion of this book as I just began it.

In this vein, i just looked up "worship" in the online Vine's Expository Dictionary, only to find 5 different verbs and 3 nouns in the greek. Here are some of my findings:

WORSHIP

1 proskuneo (Verb) - "to make obeisance [a movement of the body expressing deep respect or deferential courtesy, as before a superior; a bow, curtsy, or other similar gesture. deference or homage], do reverence to" (from pros, "towards," and kuneo, "to kiss"), is the most frequent word rendered "to worship."

2 sebomai (Verb) - "to revere," stressing the feeling of awe or devotion
3 sebazomai (Verb) - Akin to No. 2, "to honor religiously," is used in Ro. 1:25.

4 latreuo (Verb) - "to serve, to render religious service or homage," is translated both "to worship" and "to serve" depending on the translation.
5 eusebeo (Verb) - "to act piously towards"

Notes: (1) The worship of God is nowhere defined in Scripture. A consideration of the above verbs shows that it is not confined to praise; broadly it may be regarded as the direct acknowledgement to God, of His nature, attributes, ways and claims, whether by the outgoing of the heart in praise and thanksgiving or by deed done in such acknowledgment. (2) In Ac. 17:25 therapeuo, "to serve, do service to" (so RV), is rendered "is worshiped." See CURE, HEAL.

6 sebasma (Noun) - Denotes "an object of worship that is worshiped;" every object of "worship,"

7 ethelothreskeia[-ia] (Noun) - "will-worship" (ethelo, "to will," threskeia, "worship"), voluntarily adopted "worship," whether unbidden or forbidden, not that which is imposed by others, but which one affects.

8 threskeia (Noun) - For which see RELIGION, is translated "worshiping" in Col. 2:18. Note: In Lu. 14:10, AV, doxa, "glory" (RV), is translated "worship."


Worshiper

1 proskunetes - Akin to proskuneo (see WORSHIP, A, No. 1), occurs in Joh. 4:23.

2 neokoros - Is translated "worshiper" in Ac. 19:35 AV: see TEMPLE KEEPER.

3 theosebes - Denotes "reverencing God" (theos, "God," sebomai, see WORSHIP), and is rendered "a worshiper of God"

---
wor·ship

–noun
1. reverent honor and homage paid to God or a sacred personage, or to any object regarded as sacred.
2. formal or ceremonious rendering of such honor and homage
3. adoring reverence or regard: excessive worship of business success.
4. the object of adoring reverence or regard.
5. (initial capital letter) British. a title of honor used in addressing or mentioning certain magistrates and others of high rank or station (usually prec. by Your, His, or Her).

–verb (used with object)
6. to render religious reverence and homage to.
7. to feel an adoring reverence or regard for (any person or thing).

–verb (used without object)
8. to render religious reverence and homage, as to a deity.
9. to attend services of divine worship.
10. to feel an adoring reverence or regard.

Here are some passages that came up in my search of "worship" --

"And it came to pass when the priests came out of the Most Holy Place (for all the priests who were present had sanctified themselves, without keeping to their divisions), and the Levites who were the singers, all those of Asaph and Heman and Jeduthun, with their sons and their brethren, stood at the east end of the altar, clothed in white linen, having cymbals, stringed instruments and harps, and with them one hundred and twenty priests sounding with trumpets-- indeed it came to pass, when the trumpeters and singers were as one, to make one sound to be heard in praising and thanking the LORD, and when they lifted up their voice with the trumpets and cymbals and instruments of music, and praised the LORD, saying:

"For He is good, for His mercy endures forever," that the house, the house of the LORD, was filled with a cloud, so that the priests could not continue ministering because of the cloud; for the glory of the LORD filled the house of God. (2 Chronicles 5:11-14)

"O God, You are my God; early will I seek You; my soul thirsts for You; my flesh longs for You in a dry and thirsty land where there is no water. So I have looked for You in the sanctuary, to see Your power and Your glory. Because Your lovingkindness is better than life, my lips shall praise You. Thus I will bless You while I live; I will lift up my hands in Your name. My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness, and my mouth shall praise You with joyful lips." (Psalm 63:1-5)

"After these things God tested Abraham and said to him, “Abraham!” And he said, “Here am I.” He said, “Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains of which I shall tell you.” So Abraham rose early in the morning, saddled his donkey, and took two of his young men with him, and his son Isaac. And he cut the wood for the burnt offering and arose and went to the place of which God had told him. On the third day Abraham lifted up his eyes and saw the place from afar. Then Abraham said to his young men, “Stay here with the donkey; I and the boy will go over there and worship and come again to you.” And Abraham took the wood of the burnt offering and laid it on Isaac his son. And he took in his hand the fire and the knife. So they went both of them together. And Isaac said to his father Abraham, “My father!” And he said, “Here am I, my son.” He said, “Behold, the fire and the wood, but where is the lamb for a burnt offering?” Abraham said, “God will provide for himself the lamb for a burnt offering, my son.” So they went both of them together.

When they came to the place of which God had told him, Abraham built the altar there and laid the wood in order and bound Isaac his son and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. Then Abraham reached out his hand and took the knife to slaughter his son. But the angel of the Lord called to him from heaven and said, “Abraham, Abraham!” And he said, “Here am I.” He said, “Do not lay your hand on the boy or do anything to him, for now I know that you fear God, seeing you have not withheld your son, your only son, from me.” And Abraham lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, behind him was a ram, caught in a thicket by his horns. And Abraham went and took the ram and offered it up as a burnt offering instead of his son. So Abraham called the name of that place, “The Lord will provide”; as it is said to this day, “On the mount of the Lord it shall be provided.”

And the angel of the Lord called to Abraham a second time from heaven and said, “By myself I have sworn, declares the Lord, because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, I will surely bless you, and I will surely multiply your offspring as the stars of heaven and as the sand that is on the seashore. And your offspring shall possess the gate of his enemies, and in your offspring shall all the nations of the earth be blessed, because you have obeyed my voice.”" (Genesis 22:1-18)

Genesis 24:26,48 - where the servant goes on Isaac's behalf and God provides a wife, Rebekah, as He had promised

Exodus 12:27 - after God passed over and both delivered Israel from enslavement to Egypt, defending them, and led them to the promised land

"And the people believed; and when they heard that the Lord had visited the people of Israel and that he had seen their affliction, they bowed their heads and worshiped." (Exodus 4:31)

And there are MANY, many more but this is just a beginning... God is AMAZING and as we encounter His glory and His PRESENCE our only response is to worship (in actions, attitude, words,...). And it changes us in the process, making us more like Him, helping us to live our lives in submission to Him, helping us to love and care for others as He does. AMAZING!!!

dancing

i just commented on a friend's post about dancing, i think specifically salsa. anyway... i told her a fun story about my time in orlando and thought it worth repeating here.

my friend bekah, who will soon be in madrid with me, loves to dance, particularly salsa. i do too, but not as much as bekah. so during the training she was going through and i was coaching in florida, on occasion bekah organized a salsa night, either to teach people or to go out. i can't say that i went to as many nights as i would have liked, but the one night i went out with them was FABULOUS and a time forever sketched in my memories.

there was a salsa convention going on in town, so we went to the open dancing. there were three of us women and two guys. we got there and were blown away by the dancers, all professional or semi-professional. i felt like i was on the set or in a movie, definitely very surreal. and they were definitely FAR out of our league. but we danced anyway and i had the greatest time!!! i felt like a star. while i'm sure i didn't look anything like them, i pretended i did and felt like a million dollars. damien and drew being there to dance with, along with the other random guys i danced with were obviously fairly key. it was definitely a night to remember. i only wish i had some pictures to go along with it.

and the venue was stellar. a huge ballroom with a hardwood floor and all the glitz to go with it. it kind of made me think of the japanese version of "shall we dance" (which by the way is MUCH better and came out far before the american version with richard gere).

Note: By the way, the picture above is from the Antonio Banderes (he's spanish) movie "Take The Lead" which I just saw a few days ago at a friend's house a few days ago in Lawrence, KS, while I was preparing for my talk on Spain at Grace EPC. It is a GREAT movie that is about dancing but also a lot more. Definitely a great movie to rent.

one life

There's a story I've heard several times and thought I'd post. Apparently it was inspired by the writing of Loren Eiseley, who combined his insights from being both a scientist and a poet.

"Once upon a time, there was a wise man, much like Eiseley himself, who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.

One day he was walking along the shore. As he looked down the beach, he saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself to think of someone who would dance to the day. So he began to walk faster to catch up. As he got closer, he saw that it was a young man and the young man wasn't dancing, but instead he was reaching down to the shore, picking up something and very gently throwing it into the ocean.

As he got closer, he called out, "Good morning! What are you doing?"

The young man paused, looked up and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."

"I guess I should have asked, Why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?"

"The sun is up and the tide is going out. And if I don't throw them in they'll die." "

But young man, don't you realize that there are miles and miles of beach and starfish all along it. You can't possibly make a difference!"

The young man listened politely. Then bent down, picked up another starfish and threw it into the sea, past the breaking waves.

"It made a difference for that one!"

His response surprised the man. He was upset. He didn't know how to reply. So instead, he turned away and walked back to the cottage to begin his writings. All day long as he wrote, the image of the young man haunted him. He tried to ignore it, but the vision persisted. Finally, late in the afternoon he realized that he the scientist, he the poet, had missed out on the essential nature of the young man's actions.

Because he realized that what the young man was doing was choosing not to be an observer in the universe and make a difference. He was embarrassed. That night he went to bed troubled. When the morning came he awoke knowing that he had to do something. So he got up, put on his clothes, went to the beach and found the young man. And with him he spent the rest of the morning throwing starfish into the ocean.

You see, what that young man's actions represent is something that is special in each and everyone of us. We have all been gifted with the ability to make a difference. And if we can, like that young man, become aware of that gift, we gain through the strength of our vision the power to shape the future. And that is your challenge. And that is my challenge. We must each find our starfish. And if we throw our stars wisely and well, I have no question that the 21st century is going to be a wonderful place."

I like this story because it emphasizes the value of one life. The past few days I've been speaking at several churches and to several small groups of how the Lord is at work in Spain. It has been good to say and hear again why I am there. The reality there is a little grim if you merely look at the presence, but the reality of the future, that unknown, is hopeful, hopeful because of the God whom I serve and of His heart for individual people, his heart for the world. I know not the details of the next few years, but i am hopeful that He who began a work in me will do the same in many others. He is a God of redemption and a God of peace and hope.

compassion

Note: This is a picture of the empty tomb where Jesus is thought to have been laid.

i just read some quotes and verses on a friend's blog about being a "world Christian," one who cares for and loves the world, wanting all people to hear the Gospel of Christ. in wanting to be more intentional to pray for the world, i may put up some similar quotes. i don't have much now, but will put up more as i think of them or find them.

"This is what the Lord Almighty says: 'Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another.'" Zechariah 7:9

"He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?" Micah 6:8

Ethiopian Food

In thinking about coming back to the US there were two things I wanted to eat - lots of blueberries & ethiopian food. Somehow I don't tend to crave much food from back home. Living in Madrid, I can find just about any kind of ethnic food I might want and the ingredients for just about anything I'd want to make.

Blueberries are abundant in the states during the summer, so that has been easy.

Ethiopian food has been a little trickier since I was only in Lawrence, KS, three days and the restaurant I was hoping was still open was closed. Fortunately on my jaunt through Atlanta, in looking for a coffee shop I stumbled upon Amy's Ethiopian Café. I walked in and was welcomed by some strong cardamom smelling incense, by some strange looks (i was the only white, non-ethiopian in the place), and everything written in amharic (the language spoken in ethiopia, which is non-roman letters). I asked if I could have a glass of water and a half portion of one of the lunch vegetarian platters. (It was about 16:00 and I was planning to eat with some friends a bit later.) It was absolutely perfect. And while I ate, I watched some of the foreign news on Aljazeera, the Arabic News Network. It was perfect. The only unfortunate part is that I didn't have time to go back before I left.

So... ethiopian food in my opinion is incredible and some of the best ethnic food I've ever had. It is however, pretty different, so some people don't much care for it.

What I like is the rich, explosion of flavor you have in every bite. AND you get to eat with your hands and from a communal plate. You use the injera bread, which looks like a thick crepe, but is made from a grain you have probably never had, teff. It tastes a bit vinagery and has a texture unlike anything else. My dad is not a huge fan. You tear off a piece and use that to pick up the other foods. It is INCREIBLE!

So I've just looked up several restaurants here in St. Louis and am hoping to convince someone to go with me. Buen provecho!

Florida Roadkill & Fauna

As I drove cross-country to and from Florida, I noticed that the common roadkill changed drastically upon arriving to Florida. Instead of the everyday pets and possum of the midwest and honestly not that much in the roadkill department, in Florida (at least in Kissimmee on the roads I was traveling with frequency) I saw several new armadillos a day and on ocassion the tortoise or alligator. Fortunately I wasn't responsible for the death of any of them, in fact I saved at least one armadillo by stopping for him to cross and stopping traffic in the process (although I was just in a parking lot). No other state was quite like Florida.

The roadkill does reflect upon the fauna of Florida and unfortunately also attracted the frightening turkey vultures to feed upon the dead carcases. Gross and a bit disturbing. In addition to these animals there are quite a few long legged birds, like heron and sand crane. In addition, there were a plethora of frogs, many both in number and in type, and lizards, both of which I am a huge fan. And while not an animal, there are an abundance of water lilies (and many growing in the sometimes not so pretty swamps).

remembering...

It is amazing how time passes and though things change, how things can remain very much the same.

Being back in the states and particularly the past couple days in lawrence has been fun, a bit surreal, and makes me feel as if i almost never left or have just been gone a few months. things have changed, little details, but much remains the same.

It has been fun to run into old friends and it's been fun to run into students who were freshmen when i left and who now are about ready to graduate, graduate, and some married or soon to be married.

It has been good to remember both what God has done in the past, to see what He is doing and has done during the time I've been gone, and it's been good to share what He has done and is doing in Spain. Remembering is a good thing, a very good thing. The Bible talks a lot about remembering and about building memorials of God's faithfulness, of remembering who he is and what he has done.

Telling of God's faithfulness and workings and hearing of them are good for my heart and my soul. Both have helped me to be encouraged about the future. Both have helped me to be hopeful even in the midst of life's difficult times. And thanking and praising God as I remember are things that I've realized I NEED. I can't really live and do well without REMEMBERING & WORSHIPPING God for who He is and what He has done.

So thank you to all the people who have been a part of me remembering (and verbally processing and both saying and hearing of God's goodness).

Perspective

A friend of mine, Deb Heefner, gave a great devotional during Xtrack (the CCC Cross-cultural Training at which I have been coaching people headed overseas).

As a means of revisiting, processing, and sharing, here are my notes and I'm sure some added thoughts:

Psalm 73 (ESV):

Truly God is good to Israel, to those who are pure in heart.

But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled, my steps had nearly slipped. For I was envious of the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

For they have no pangs until death; their bodies are fat and sleek. They are not in trouble as others are; they are not stricken like the rest of mankind. Therefore pride is their necklace; violence covers them as a garment. Their eyes swell out through fatness; their hearts overflow with follies. They scoff and speak with malice; loftily they threaten oppression. They set their mouths against the heavens, and their tongue struts through the earth. Therefore his people turn back to them, and find no fault in them. And they say, “How can God know? Is there knowledge in the Most High?” Behold, these are the wicked; always at ease, they increase in riches.

All in vain have I kept my heart clean and washed my hands in innocence. For all the day long I have been stricken and rebuked every morning. If I had said, “I will speak thus,” I would have betrayed the generation of your children.

But when I thought how to understand this, it seemed to me a wearisome task, until I went into the sanctuary of God; then I discerned their end.

Truly you set them in slippery places; you make them fall to ruin. How they are destroyed in a moment, swept away utterly by terrors! Like a dream when one awakes, O Lord, when you rouse yourself, you despise them as phantoms. When my soul was embittered, when I was pricked in heart, I was brutish and ignorant; I was like a beast toward you.

Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

For behold, those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you. But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all your works.


Salmo 73

Ciertamente Dios es bueno para con Israel, para con los puros de corazón. En cuanto a mí, mis pies estuvieron a punto de tropezar, casi resbalaron mis pasos. Porque tuve envidia de los arrogantes, al ver la prosperidad de los impíos. Porque no hay dolores en su muerte, y su cuerpo es robusto. No sufren penalidades como los mortales, ni son azotados como los demás hombres. Por tanto, el orgullo es su collar; el manto de la violencia los cubre. Los ojos se les saltan de gordura; se desborda su corazón con sus antojos. Se mofan, y con maldad hablan de opresión; hablan desde su encumbrada posición. Contra el cielo han puesto su boca, y su lengua se pasea por la tierra.
Por eso el pueblo de Dios vuelve a este lugar, y beben las aguas de la abundancia.
Y dicen: ¿Cómo lo sabe Dios? ¿Y hay conocimiento en el Altísimo?He aquí, estos son los impíos, y, siempre desahogados, han aumentado sus riquezas.

Ciertamente en vano he guardado puro mi corazón y lavado mis manos en inocencia; pues he sido azotado todo el día y castigado cada mañana. Si yo hubiera dicho: Así hablaré, he aquí, habría traicionado a la generación de tus hijos.

Cuando pensaba, tratando de entender esto, fue difícil para mí, hasta que entré en el santuario de Dios; entonces comprendí el fin de ellos. Ciertamente tú los pones en lugares resbaladizos; los arrojas a la destrucción.¡Cómo son destruidos en un momento! Son totalmente consumidos por terrores repentinos. Como un sueño del que despierta, oh Señor, cuando te levantes, despreciarás su apariencia. Cuando mi corazón se llenó de amargura, y en mi interior sentía punzadas, entonces era yo torpe y sin entendimiento; era como una bestia delante de ti. Sin embargo, yo siempre estoy contigo; tú me has tomado de la mano derecha. Con tu consejo me guiarás, y después me recibirás en gloria. ¿A quién tengo yo en los cielos, sino a ti? Y fuera de ti, nada deseo en la tierra. Mi carne y mi corazón pueden desfallecer, pero Dios es la fortaleza de mi corazón y mi porción para siempre. Porque he aquí, los que están lejos de ti perecerán; tú has destruido a todos los que te son infieles. Mas para mí, estar cerca de Dios es mi bien; en DIOS el Señor he puesto mi refugio, para contar todas tus obras.

"as for me, my feet had almost stumbled, my steps had nearly slipped...

(v. 3-12) ... they... they... they (focus on "they" - "they"- -- symptoms of something deeper)
(v. 13-15) ... I... I... I (focus on "I" -- also symptom of something deeper)

v. 16, 17 "... but when I thought how to understand this, it seemed to me a wearisome task, UNTIL I went into the sanctuary of God..."

v. 23, 24 "... nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory."

v. 25-26 "... Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth, that I desire beside you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

He was overwhelmed until he entered God's presence. Then he gained perspective.

1. He saw God's Perpetual Presence

"... I am continually with you ... I uphold you with my righteous right hand."

"I'm okay, daddy, as long as I am holding your hand." He will not let go. The crowds may come, but he remains faithful. (The picture of a dad in a large crowd with his little daughter. She is calm and secure as long as she knows her dad is there holding her hand (and thus protecting her).)

v. 27-28 "... For behold, those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you. But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all your works."

2. He gained Perspective (instead of "they" or "me" being the focus, HE needs to be our focus)

... YOU will guide me with your counsel
... with His counsel, He will guide me, giving us perspective and lifting our eyes up to him
... there will never be a point where I do not have his counsel, even if it seems cloudy or confusing or unknown

3. He saw the God was/is his Profound Provision

... HE is Our Power and Our Portion
... the promised inheritance
... He's my Rock, He's my FORTRESS, He's my DELIVERER; in Him will I trust. Praise the name of Jesus!

... He is my portion and my life forever... He is enough, more than enough...

4. He saw that God is Just and Fulfills his Promises

"The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance." (2 Peter 3:9)

5. He sees the goodness of God's Presence and Protection (v. 28)

... the nearness of God is good
"... Taste and see that the Lord is good... and He is my portion forever."

Where is your refuge? Where do you run to?

Refection Questions:

- What are times or areas of your life when you have been more apt to focus on the "they" (either blaming, judging, being critical of them, worrying, wondering what they might think, etc.,) or on the "me" (protecting your rights, being self-critical, self-protecting, self-centered, prideful, etc.,)?

- What have you found to help you in these times?

- What are some warning signs for you that you are focusing on "them" or "me" too much?

Note: By the way, isn't the little lizard ADORABLE!!!

Coffee shops in USA vs. España

I just sat down in a coffee shop to visit a friend and am struck by the complete silence. I remember this place having music or something, but I think the greater contrast has to do with the differences between Spain & the US. Coffee shops in Spain are a place where people meet to talk or to socialize. It is rare to see anyone sitting alone and if they are they are likely reading the paper early in the morning and talking on occasion to the guy behind the bar and to the locals. In the US coffee shops can be places to meet people, but are also places to get work done, to study, to sit down alone for hours on end. Thus the difference... Spanish coffee shops are FULL of activity and noise. American coffee shops may too be somewhat noisy, but may sound more like a library than a social place. It is odd to me to look around and to see one, only one table with more than one person. And it only has two people. And presently NO ONE is talking, just about everyone has a laptop out and if not than a book from which they are studying. Granted I am in a college town and it is about 16:30 in the afternoon, but still. Even if I am here to catch up on e-mail, journal, and to be alone with other people around (and ideally with some noise to help me concentrate, ironic i know), I would like others to be interacting with each other.

The Joy of Hybrids

Those of you who were with me in Orlando, now know all the joys of the Toyota Prius and probably more than you wanted to know. And for those of you who weren't you can now read all about the AMAZING and ECONOMIC Toyota Prius.

My dad offered his car for me to drive to Florida (from St.Louis) and back, along with my other driving needs during my time in the US. It has been a HUGE blessing, just to have wheels, but also INCREDIBLE that it is a hybrid, due to crazy high gas prices.

So, first of all, my dad's hybrid, which was the first Toyota Prius Hybrid they made is not quite as fancy as my mom's new updated one. His doesn't have cruise control nor anything more than a radio & cassette player and there are a few little details they have ironed out since this first model. BUT, all that said, despite it not being a manual car, it is a FABULOUS car.

1 - You get great gas mileage. I've averaged about 40 MPG, but I think gotten up to 42 or 45 MPG from time to time. (My mom's newer prius gets about 50 MPG.) In comparison to a normally fuel efficient non-hybrid, this is incredible. This is probably the coolest thing.

2 - There is a fun little screen in the car that keeps track of your mileage at any given time, both present and it tracks it with a bar graph in 5 mile increments. Secondly, there is a fun little graphic you can look at that shows where energy is coming from and going to.

3 - My mom's new and improved prius has some added features. It is MAGICAL! You just have to have the keys on you to open the door. But you don't have to actually take them out. You just touch the door handle and magically it opens! And you touch it again for all the doors to open. You can do the same with the trunk, just touch it and MAGIC it opens (if you have the keys on your person). Then you sit down and put the power button and turns on. Again no key. Easy and AMAZING!

And this little car safely took me across the country and back. So there you go. My dad and his little hybrid are amazing!

Ode to Lawrence...

So... I am presently in my old home of Lawrence, Kansas. I spent a few years here in between Sevilla, Spain, and Madrid, while I was on staff with CCC here at KU (University of Kansas).

I have to say that Lawrence is a GREAT city and one of my favorite places. Part of it is sentimental, emotional and more about the memories and people than the actual place. That being said, here are some of the things I love most about Lawrence.

1 - Mass Street & downtown - part of what I love about it is it feels European to me with all the outside seating along the street, little cafes, great local food, a pretty large area that you can walk around and to, great art & art galleries, good coffee, good sushi, good mediterranean food,...

2 - You can still walk or ride a bike around town and it is somewhat normal

3 - The great hills to run or bike

4 - The million local coffeeshops, each with its own character and most with a GREAT soy cappichino

5 - KU - the campus is beautiful, the energy of a college campus, it's on a great hill, the great feel of a college town, memories,... KU basketball

6 - Signs of Life, Milton's, Wheatfield's

7 - Clinton Lake and the trails leading there and around there

8 - Great mountain bike trails & great memories both of flying off my bike and of not

9 - Grace EPC - a place & family that I love dearly - genuine community, great teaching - an amazing place

10 - there are a million more reasons Lawrence is great and the people I know and love there are definitely a huge part.

driving...

So, I have just made the short 20+ hour trek from Orlando, Florida, to Lawrence, Kansas, with a brief stop in Atlanta, Georgia, where I spent the night at Macy & Rick's place, on the 29th floor of a skyscraper in Atlanta's downtown. (Macy spent a year with me in Sevilla, Spain, back in 2000-2001.)

While I was driving I made a little list of possibly blog-worthy subjects (along with several other idea lists or to do lists):

The Joy of Hybrids
Florida Roadkill
Izzes & Izze-esque
The Amazing Ipod Sync-er
Three spiders & much doghair later...
Shots of Coffee & Driving
The many things which can be done while driving
Ethiopian Food
Child Soldiers in Burma
Last Night
Yesterday - Me & Jesus
Fear & God
Atlanta
God's Tenderness to Me
Ode to Lawrence, KS

The next few weeks is going to be fairly full, so we'll see if I get to blogging any of them before I make another list and get back to the posts I've already begun from my time in Florida.

Vision, Hope & Dreams

Part of my job on occasion, actually quite often, is to write a vision plan, to write what I see in a person's life (strengths, giftings, personality & character traits, areas for development & growth, etc.,) and to dream (based on these things and trusting the Lord to work in them) what the Lord could do in them and through them in their next step of life and helping them to develop a Personal Development Plan (a plan of how to grow both in strength areas and areas of weakness). I love doing this. Having just finished writing three of them (consisting of 2-6 pages each) I am energized and ready for them to conquer the world. And it helps me to rejoice in how the Lord has made them and things he may do in and through them in the coming years.

gators

I am presently living in the state filled with gators and have just a couple of stories so far related to gators.

One, the other day as Erica and I were driving home from a great time at a Sara & Mike's place, I saw something snake like up ahead in my lane. As I got closer I mentioned it to Erica and at just about the same time we both said, "Is that an alligator?" I think it made both of our days because we have been dying to see one since we got here. Its length was about the width of my car (actually my dad's car on loan - a toyota prius) and it was dark brownish green (although it also was about 1am and very dark out).

Two, apparently CCC has at least one little gator on its property at Lake Hart. I have yet to actually lay eyes on it, but I have dreams of going in search of the little gator or even finding a few more. I have ideas of how to find it, but nothing that is sane enough to carry out.